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Why Gays & Lesbians Need To Focus More On Mental Health

By | Counselling, LGBTQI, Shame, Therapy | No Comments

Imagine for a moment that you’re broken your foot or sprained your ankle. You would naturally go to the doctor or your physiotherapist who would then begin treatment. This treatment could take a handful of weeks or perhaps even months, depending on how severe it is. During that time, you may have to walk on crutches and, no doubt, your friends will write witty comments on your plaster cast if you have one. You would receive well wishes from your friends hoping for a speedy recovery and you would follow the instructions of your doctor or physio until such time that the problem was fixed and you were capable of walking on your own again. This makes sense, doesn’t it? Yet consider the difference when it comes to mental health. Now, like a broken or sprained foot, you may not be able to see the issue but you can certainly feel it. Yet how many people are hesitant to go and see a specialist to fix the situation. They sit in fears of shame and guilt that they should be stronger. They sit with fear of what their family and friends will think, scared that they’ll be exposed as weak…

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‘R U Ok?’ Day

By | Counselling, Therapy | No Comments

Today is ‘R U Ok?’ day. Is it necessary? Absolutely yes. Mental health is a big issue (especially in the LGBTQI community) yet so many people are ill-equipped to either deal with their own mental health or how to help and care for someone struggling. Do we need more information about this? Absolutely yes. While asking ‘R U Ok?’ is a great starting point, we need to know what to do if a person says, ‘No, no I’m not.’ If you experience that, on the spot, it might cause you to feel anxiety that may prevent you from asking that question again! We wouldn’t want that! So, what should you do? Simply, ask questions about what the person is experiencing and listen – actively listen – be there to just listen, not offer your opinion or your experience – just listen and show that person you genuinely, absolutely care. Questions like ‘tell me more about what you’re feeling’ and offering back what you’re hearing (ie ‘Your workplace is making you feel really vulnerable, is that right?’) can help a person to just explore more deeply what they’re feeling and to gain some insight. Asking questions like ‘what do you think…

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Why Bother? It’s Going To Be Crap Anyway.

By | ACT, Counselling, Hypnotherapy, Mindfulness | No Comments

I went to my accountant today. Some of my regular blog readers may have suspected (especially given the topic of my last article) that things have been a little rough of late and I have to admit, as I was going up the elevator to see my accountant, there was a little voice in my head that said, ‘what’s the bet that you’re going to have to pay tax this year. What’s the bet that my accountant will look at me and say, Lawrence, I’m sorry but you’re going to have to pay up big this year! That will be just typical of what’s happening for me right now…’ And I have to say, I’m not alone in having a mindset like that. How many of us have had a few bad experiences and seemingly fall into this head space where we just expect the worst to happen. It’s like we’re standing in that moment, using our imagination to time travel into the future, and experience in all the painful, difficult, uncomfortable ways how everything is going to pan out. I’m sure you’ve had that experience before; we all have. It’s just how our human mind likes to trick us….

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