Book Review: Find The Blessing In The Bullshit – Dean Murphy
Find The Blessing In The Bullshit
In his book ‘Find the Blessing In The Bullshit’, Dean Murphy proposes a really simple question; ‘why settle for average?’ Over the years, Murphy has worn multiple hats but one that seems to resonate in being a coach. In that role, he has helped people to find both motivation and inspiration so that they can go on to life a purpose driven life. This book, an achievement for someone who shares that he is dyslexia, offers up some of the wisdom and guidance that he no doubt offers his clients in session.
The Pillars of Mental Health
Personally, whenever I talk about the key traits one should have for mental health, I tend to focus on skills such as gratitude, acceptance, surrender, and compassion. It’s great to see that Dean seems to sing from the same hymn book here. Much of the book is spent in discussion on topics such as gratitude and acceptance.
The title refers to a conscious action Murphy offers his clients. Murphy acknowledges that our life is going to have challenging moments and events that can be hard to navigate. There is the realisation that we can, and will, make some bad decisions in life. What Murphy offers is to find the positive in any of those situations so that we don’t get held back by regret. This conscious process combined gratitude along with a reframe that allows a positive learning to come from those past events in order that we can let them go. It’s a simple yet exceedingly powerful concept.
Murphy also spends some time talking about the five stages of emotional healing that he has noticed through his life, being hurt, sadness, depression, anger, and acceptance. The insight here might be useful for people who seem stuck in a certain state and may need a helping hand to gently nudge them along.
A lot of this often comes back to a theme of living an inspired, purpose driven life. Murphy often focuses on building ‘the why’. This is more than mere motivation, but a construction of influences and mindsets that can become so compelling that it is almost inevitable to achieve success.
Murphy also offers the idea of being authentic and does this through his own story telling. While this book has many stories of people to share, some are absolutely hilarious, it is his own story that is often the most vulnerable. By being willing to share some of the darkest periods of his life and the thoughts and feelings he experienced during that time, he helps to normalise the experience. In doing this, he may just be helping others experiencing similar dark thoughts right now, and inspire them towards a better tomorrow.
Towards the end of the book, Murphy explores a range of lifestyle topics, such as relationships, drugs, social media, and even suicide. Each has their own thought provoking moments that, despite a few black and white statements, tend to frequently feel true and accurate.
Who Is This Book For?
To be honest, I think everyone can get something from this book. There is enough real world lived experience in this book that I suspect everyone can find at least one or two nuggets of wisdom that can help enrich their lives. What I do admire about this book is that the tone of voice is both masculine and friendly; imagine your ‘big brother’ giving you nurturing advice. For this reason, I honestly feel that this book should be on the syllabus for every year 11 and 12 student. If there is one thing that our education system often lacks is to teach people about how to think instead of what to think.
I know that when I often talk to my clients about ‘acceptance’, I’ll often ask them what acceptance means to them? They’ll be familiar with the concept, but often will struggle to give a response that they find acceptable. When we talk more about the definition of acceptance, it can begin to shift how they engage with this thing called acceptance. This is the power of ‘Find the Blessing In The Bullshit’. Through the narrative of others stories and experiences, tying it in with some of these skills, it can help to transform how people may choose to look at their problems. That’s pretty powerful in itself.
Purchase Find The Blessing In The Bullshit
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